assessments' in a week time.
i needa finish all my work.

the last portion aint for y'all.
only one person's allowed to read.
so the rest of yu, respect me.
dont try to read it.

i mean it.

*to that close friend who told me
as long as i aint gonna regret :
i know i will once i publish this post.
but, i cant afford another session like
the other time on the phone.
its never been this hard ever.
i know yu aint doing good.
its alright. yu dont have to bother.
i can cope with it.














my patience was never good.
well, at least i dont think so.

i'm impatient in everything.
i cant wait for sth good to happen quick.

but i tried to change.

for instance, i've waited for 3 months.
i was even ready to accept
not getting into the whole thing.

but now that i'm in,
how i wish i'm not.

at least, things would be back to the past.
i'd give everything i have for things to go back.
but would yu?

ha.
i starting to doubt so.
from the day yu told me
yu dont know if this should continue
i guess i alr knew the answer.

do yu bother anymore?
do yu even care anymore?
are yu oblivious to everything?
do i even mean sth anymore?

i'm sorry.
i dont wanna doubt yu.
but it seems to me like yu dont.

yu totally forgotten bout me today.

everyday, yu tell me its yur problem.
yu tell me, yu dont wanna talk bout it.
yu tell me, "ignore me"

its okay.
its okay for all those cold msgs.
its okay for all those cold treatments.
its okay that yu'd rather meet other people but me.
its okay that yu think i'm taking this well.

now, let me tell yu.

yeah its okay.

it really is.

i understand.
yu're not used to it or stuff.
okay.

but if yu think by avoiding it
and not talking about it
not telling me anything
not giving me a answer

is the best solution,

okay. so be it.

i'm fine with it.

i'll respect any decision yu make.

because i'm alr this close to giving up
and no this isnt a threat or sth.
but i just wanna let yu know
if yu wanna end this,
please tell me. now.

i'd rather yu tell me than i tell yu.
because i know i wouldnt let go
if i was the one who told yu.

and i aint gonna lie
i did thought of calling it off.
but i know i'd regret.

then again.
who knows.

ha.

baby, baby, tell me what to do
for i'm losing myself.



i guess, it doesnt matter anymore..


bye guys.