I could hear me.

Day 207



everyone's having problems these days.
yu wonder why, i wonder why too.
even they themselves haven got no answers.
neither do i.


for the first time in my life i heard my own heartbeat.
as in, heard it really beating.
like, *thump... thump...*


it was real slow, real soft..
then, i tried feeling it.
it felt real, yet unconvincing.


wondering why am i writing all these?
i dont know too.
there're just so many i-dont-knows in this world.
and, since no one's perfect, why do people still practice when the saying goes, practice makes perfect?
kinda bull aint it?


uhh, i'm sorta crapping but i guess the intense thinking of a few things these days are keeping my brain alive and moving.
if not, i guess i'd be long gone.


its kinda nonsensical to write about practically nothing.
to blog about something i dont know how to express in words.
to think about things that will never happen.
to actually bother to try salvaging something that hasnt even happened.


why do we even fall in love?
to suffer? keep our asses busy with our partner?
to feel loved? to make ourselves satisfied?
to show off? to do all those whatnot?


i dont know man.
i used this as my personal msg just now,
"relationship's a killer. it kills innocent people. it leaves yu feeling high and dry."
i mean, who doesnt feel so?
then, someone came and ask me,
"so yu dont plan to get into a relationship?"


uh, i dont know how to answer.
maybe i'm single and i'm loving it?
maybe i'm trying to deny the fact that no one's after me?
okay. i'm not a material worth looking out for.
thats what a "friend" said before.
okay, i admit it.
no one loves me.
no one's after me.
no one gives no shyt bout me.


so, i'm pathetic. yes.
i admit.


yeah whatever~
there'll just be times i wanna whine so much, yet there's no ear to listen.
i wonder.
when will i find someone, be it my other half or, a very very good friend
who's willing to feel my pain, listen to my greivances without no complains, share my happiness and my sufferings?


it need not be my other half, it can be my best friend.
but as of currently, i dont even know if there is..
maybe i chased that person away without knowing.
argh.


crapping away. okay. sorry to have left my blog to rot.
was busy with 4e4'04 's blog see.
its kinda cute. but urh, only raf and mel's visiting it?
zzz. there's no 4e4 people who actually reads my blog also.
so, i'm kinda wasting my time here.


okay lets see. just a simple song.

空无一人 这片沙滩

风吹过来 冷冷海岸我轻轻抖落鞋里的沙

看着我的脚印OH 一个人一步步

好寂寞 看海有些绿天有些蓝

那段爱情有些遗憾

向不知不觉游向海天 到最深的地方

才发现你早已经放弃我

我听到海浪 温柔的呼吸

我听到云朵飘来飘去 有什么方法

让自己真的忘记 ONLY BLUE ONLY BLUE

爱让人好忧郁 我的心我的心

蓝蓝地 我真的想找一条船

能远远开这片沙滩 每次又回到同样海边

还是会对你想念想念你有点 BLUE

没有人能向你

留给我的回忆有点

BLUE OH ONLY BLUE















like, finally. a pic.



uhh. she's the real SUPERSTAR.



someone PLEASE holla me if yu see this in sg. thanks.



Okay, enough of nonsense today.


Bye guys.


ciao~


P.S

i miss sherry. badly. do yu think yu can come back within 16 days and make someone's wish come true?
uhh, i guess not.


i'm searching for my darling. in vain.
but she's always so busy. zzz with jolin. -.- and her nails. okay.
i miss yu too. more than anyone else.


i need my baby. so much so i hope she'll sms me.
but, i guess she also too busy with her band and all.
i think she doesnt even know me anymore. #@$@#%@#%


uh, amelia, please. just admit yu miss me.

min, i love yu! smile k. he dont want yu, there's always me.
i dont mind being ya spare. =D

raf, dont despair cause cam is here! haha =p

dt, i love yur personal msg. LOL. ocbc~






yawns...